2021. Wow. We've come this far.
Despite what's going on with the world, I'm still looking forward for this year.
I am claiming it. I am fully manifesting everything I have planned this year.
I am claiming it. It will happen. It is happening.
Halfway through this month and I can say that it has been nice.
Heart, ok. Happy. At peace.
Mental Health, there are still sad days for no or random reason but still ok.
Body, haven’t had soda since the year started. Less sugar intake.
I suck at blogging when I'm happy but I'm trying to make it a habit to do it or even write about it.
I figured it sucks I only write when I’m sad, that’s why I only remember detailed sadness and just like high level feeling of happiness.
Gotta work on saying what's on my mind and how I’m feeling regardless if I’m happy or sad.
And by that, I just wanna say it and make it official on my blog that... I am in a relationship.
To be honest, I didn't wanna say that out loud or like say it to other people just because y’all know I've been there, done that. I don't wanna assume shit lol I know talking and being in a relationship are two different things but yes, we've defined it. Let me just say I still get butterflies when he tells other people we are dating now and when he tells me he loves me. Eeeeh ok imma stop :">
I swear my past relationships or whateverships ruined me so much. I get so happy with the littlest things lol
But, yeah, we are dating ♡
This is not news to my close friends cause I've told them during our get togethers over the holidays.
I am happy. Overwhelming kind of happiness that just brings happy tears to my eyes.
It's also heartwarming hearing my friends tell me how they’re happy for me and how I deserve this kind of love and happiness.
They know what I've been through. They witnessed how broken I was. I can feel how genuine their happiness is for me.
My traumatized ass is still trynna adjust over how mature and healthy this relationship is but we'll get there. We always do.
My past relationships made me think that saying what I feel or what I’m thinking would always result to arguments and I will be apologizing for it in the end. It is so hard being used to just keeping it all to myself.
My past relationships gave me trust issues so high that made me think if we don't talk on the phone for at least 20 hours a day, he's probably tired of me or doesn't want me that much anymore or cheating on me lol
My past relationships taught me that fighting everyday or at least most of the week is normal.
Bless Tyler's heart because that man has been patient af with me.
Tinotopak ako as always but he manages my toyo all the time. lol
I would say something and would assume a fight out of it but he will be all understanding. Ugh. lol
My doubting ass would always be doubting lol but he manages to reassure me in his own ways.
I can talk about it all day but let's just leave it at that.
It helps that we are friends for so long before we even got into this.
We've known each other better. We get along so well.
We got into a lot of mess before. We even resisted a lot of times.
All those years, we just remained friends. Being there for each other's heartbreaks.
But, maybe like he said, maybe this is fate at play.
I guess it's just right timing.
I am claiming it.
This peace of mind and happy heart, I’ve longed for this.
I deserve this. He deserves this. We deserve this.
No more doubting, no more negative thoughts.
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